On caregivers, faith, family, and writing…

Asking for help

Caregiving is a lonely job, but it doesn’t have to be. I’m not sure if it’s the pride of thinking no one can care for your loved one but you, or if it’s the guilt of feeling like you are shirking your duties if you take a break. Either way, too many caregivers try to shoulder the huge burden of caring all by themselves.

The truth is, your loved one will not suffer irreparable harm if you ask a friend to read to Mom for an hour while you go for a walk or if you hire a sitter to stay with Dad while you go on a date with your spouse. In fact, the opposite is probably true — you will both be better off after your mini-vacation.

I know from experience that nothing good comes from trying to go it alone. You might end up in the hospital with a heart condition, you might develop a chronic disease, or you might end up in a pile on the front porch. Don’t let your pride or guilt or anything else get in the way. Ask for help!



winding road Cover 25 percentA LONG AND WINDING ROAD: A Caregiver’s Tale of Life, Love, and Chaos

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Comments on: "Caregiver Quotes and Tips – Asking for Help | by Linda Brendle" (5)

  1. MRS N, the Author said:

    Reblogged this on Princess of the Light: Shining the Light For All and commented:
    My friend Linda has some excellent tips on her blog for caregivers. I love this blog post and it applies to us all! Don’t go it alone! Ask for help! 🙂 MRS N

  2. For those of us who know caregivers, a nice reminder to offer that hour of respite to someone who is. Hope you’re doing well!

    • And a good reminder to myself, Joyce. As a former caregiver I should be more aware than I am of those who need a break! All is well with us. I hope the same for you.

  3. You are 100% right. I’m not sure it makes things better for mom when I sneak away, but it has caused no irreparable damage…that’s a job for the Alzheimer’s! The problem is the enormous expense. I’ve asked around for someone who might be able to help out for less than $10 an hour and have had ZERO luck (so far – not giving up yet!)

    • Lisa, at first I was able to leave Mom and Dad for a few hours at a time, but later they couldn’t even understand my notes and find their lunch in the fridge. I finally found a lady (recommended by a friend) who would sit with them for $13 an hour. She gave them their meds and lunch, helped Mom with her bath (Dad refused!), and did some light housekeeping and laundry in their area of the house. Yes, it was expensive, but not as expensive as a nursing home for them or a psychiatrist for me. Good luck with your search!

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